I Run On Coffee And Sarcasm ~ ENGRAVED Vintage Look Wood Sign

I Run On Coffee And Sarcasm ~ ENGRAVED Vintage Look Wood SignHandcrafted by Parch-Mint Premium Wood Products – Elkhorn, Wisconsin

Are you fueled by caffeine and a sharp wit? Do you find that coffee keeps you going while sarcasm keeps you sane? Then you, my friend, have stumbled upon the perfect sign for your life! This "I Run On Coffee And Sarcasm" engraved wood plaque is more than just decor—it's a lifestyle statement, a badge of honor, and perhaps even a public service announcement for those who dare engage with you before your first cup.

Meticulously Crafted For Maximum Sass

Each sign is made one at a time, ensuring that your purchase is as unique as your coffee order (triple shot, oat milk, extra foam, two pumps of vanilla, and a dash of world-weariness, anyone?). Unlike printed or painted designs that can fade faster than your patience on a Monday morning, the lettering on this sign is ENGRAVED INTO THE WOOD—which means it’s built to last, just like your need for caffeine and your arsenal of sarcastic comebacks.

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No Mass Production Here!

This isn't some flimsy, mass-produced item from a factory overseas. Nope, this is a handcrafted, premium-quality wooden sign, made with care and a touch of snark right here in the good ol’ USA.

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What You’re Getting:

● A genuine, engraved wooden plaque measuring 3.5” H x 10” W x 3/8” D (and if you count the hanging jute cord, it’s 6¼” high).

● A rustic Antique White base color that pairs beautifully with your existing decor, whether that’s farmhouse chic, modern minimalist, or full-on coffee shrine.

● A durable, heavy jute cord for easy hanging—because who has time for complicated wall-mounting when there's coffee to drink?

● A sign that weighs approximately 6 ounces—just light enough to hang anywhere, but hefty enough to remind people that sarcasm is your second language.

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A Gift That Will Be Deeply Appreciated (Or Hilariously Misunderstood)

This sign makes a fantastic gift for coffee lovers, sarcastic souls, coworkers with a sense of humor, baristas who deserve a laugh, or even your best friend who just gets it. It’s the perfect way to add a little personality to kitchens, home coffee bars, break rooms, or anywhere you need to set the record straight about what fuels your existence.

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Need More Than One? Want It Customized?

If you want to order multiples, just shoot me a message—I’ll whip up as many as you need!
Want a different font or a different base color to better match your vibe? No problem—reach out, and I’ll be happy to create a custom version just for you!

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Handcrafted With Care – No Shortcuts, No Gimmicks

This sign is proudly made by Parch-Mint Premium Wood Products in Elkhorn, Wisconsin, using quality craftsmanship and zero shortcuts. Each piece is handled with care, ensuring that what you receive isn’t just another cheap decoration but a charming, well-made work of art that reflects your personality and attitude.

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Order Yours Today!

Whether you're buying for yourself or giving the perfect gift to a fellow coffee-fueled, sarcasm-powered individual, this sign is sure to bring smiles, chuckles, and nods of agreement. Add to cart now and let the world know exactly what you run on!