My Last Word Will Probably Be Oops! ~ ENGRAVED SHELF SITTER ~ The Ultimate Tribute to Bad Decisions

Questionable Life Choices

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You know that split-second when you realize you’ve made a very bad decision? The moment when time slows down just enough for your brain to whisper, "Welp, this is how I go," but not quite enough for you to stop the disaster from unfolding? Yeah, that moment is exactly what this sign is all about.

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If your daily life consists of minor catastrophes, accidental science experiments, and an alarming number of near-death experiences caused by your own actions, then congratulations—you’ve found your spirit sign.

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🏆 Why Is This a Must-Have?

✔ Because Accidents Happen... A Lot – If you’ve ever walked into a glass door (or worse, a screen door—the betrayal!), this sign is basically your autobiography.

✔ Durable Yet Lightweight – Much like your ability to learn from past mistakes, this sign is sturdy but light! At 2.5" x 7" x .5" and only 4 ounces, it can survive a fall (can you say the same?).

✔ Premium Engraved MDF – That’s Medium Density Fiberboard, in case you’re wondering. Not Maximum Density, because we wouldn’t trust you with anything that heavy.

✔ Handmade in Elkhorn, Wisconsin – Brought to you by Parch-Mint Premium Wood Products, a company that believes in three things: Quality craftsmanship, fine wood engraving, and watching people trip over perfectly flat surfaces.

✔ Zero Assembly Required – Unlike that bookshelf you attempted to put together with “creative” instructions, this comes fully intact.

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🛠 Where Should You Display Your New Favorite Sign?

🏡 On Your Desk – Right next to the coffee mug you keep knocking over.

🍳 In Your Kitchen – Beside the fire extinguisher, because we both know you're one experimental recipe away from an insurance claim.

🛠 In Your Garage – To commemorate that time you “fixed” the car and it immediately stopped working.

🚪 Near the Front Door – So visitors know exactly what kind of household they’ve stepped into (one with a high probability of spontaneous disasters).

📡 Next to Your Wi-Fi Router – Because if you think your life is unstable, just wait until your internet connection starts acting up.

🎮 On Your Gaming Setup – For every time you say, "I got this," only to immediately fall off a cliff.

🚑 In the ER Waiting Room – If they won’t let you hang it on the wall, at least keep it in your bag for future visits.

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🎁 The Perfect Gift for the Dangerously Clumsy

Got a friend who seems to defy physics in the worst way possible? A coworker who has an uncanny ability to break things by simply existing? A sibling who once tried to prove they could jump off the roof and land in a pool (but missed)? This sign was MADE for them.

🎁 For Your Accident-Prone Bestie – Because they need all the warnings they can get.

🎁 For That One Coworker Who’s a Walking Hazard – HR is already watching them—why not make it official?

🎁 For Your Parents – Who love to tell you, “Be careful,” only to trip over their own feet seconds later.

🎁 For Yourself – Because if you’ve read this far, we both know you’re the real target audience.

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📦 Shipping & Handling (a.k.a. "Getting It to You Without an 'OOPS' Moment")

We will package this beauty with excessive amounts of bubble wrap because, let’s be honest, your package has a 50/50 chance of an ‘oops’ moment before it even gets to you.

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🚀 FAST SHIPPING – Because we know you’ll need this ASAP for the next inevitable disaster.

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❌ DISCLAIMER: We are not responsible for any "oops" moments caused while laughing at this sign. If you spill your coffee, drop your phone on your face, or trip over absolutely nothing while admiring your purchase, that’s on you, buddy.

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🛒 Click "Add to Cart" Before You Forget (Again).

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If you hesitate too long, you’ll probably get distracted by something shiny, knock something over, and completely forget to place your order. Don’t let that happen. Click “Add to Cart” now before you have yet another “OOPS” moment!