Wag More Bark Less ENGRAVED SHELF SITTER ~ 'Speak' In Silence

Wag More, Bark Less – MDF Shelf Sitter

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🐶 Because life’s too short for unnecessary barking… unless it’s about coffee. ☕

Size Matters: 2.5” x 7” x 0.5” (It’s the perfect size—just enough to make a statement without taking over your entire existence.)

Weight: A mere 4 ounces—lighter than your dog’s attitude when they realize you’re out of treats.

Material: Engraved MDF (No, it’s not laser-engraved—it’s actually routed, because we believe in doing things the old-fashioned, sawdust-in-your-hair kind of way.)

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Proudly Designed & Made By: 🏆 Parch-Mint Premium Wood Products—A fancy name for some folks in Elkhorn, Wisconsin, who take their craftsmanship seriously… but not much else.

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Why You Need This:

Let’s face it—some people need a daily reminder to chill out. Maybe you’re one of them. Maybe your dog is. Maybe it’s that one coworker who acts like they haven’t had coffee since 1997. Either way, this charming little shelf sitter delivers an important message: Less barking, more wagging.

✔ For Dog Lovers: Because your dog totally gets this motto… even if they ignore it when the mail carrier arrives.

✔ For Office Desks: A subtle way to tell your coworkers to keep the drama to themselves.

✔ For Your Home: Adds a touch of humor and wisdom, without taking up valuable treat storage space.

✔ For That One Friend Who Complains Too Much: You know who they are. (Maybe send it anonymously?)

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Placement Ideas:

📌 On a shelf—because, well, it’s a shelf sitter.

📌 On your work desk—to remind yourself to smile when Karen from HR “circles back” for the third time today.

📌 Near your dog’s food bowl—as a gentle hint that they could also work on their patience.

📌 By the front door—so guests know the house rules before they even step in.

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Important Details:

🔹 Handcrafted & Engraved (Not some mass-produced nonsense—actual craftsmanship!)

🔹 Lightweight & Compact (Unlike your dog after a holiday feast.)

🔹 Durable MDF (Will last through many wagging tails, questionable weather, and passive-aggressive glances.)

🔹 Made in the USA 🇺🇸 (Because outsourcing is for amateurs.)

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Final Bark (See What We Did There?)

You could spend your money on something useless, like another subscription box full of things you’ll never use. Or, you could invest in wisdom, humor, and pure canine-inspired genius.

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Order yours today—before your dog starts an Etsy account and does it for you. 🐾